Because I can

"I have something I want to tell you. Just from me to you", the hiking guide Kendall said.

He had been ahead of me most of the way.
My legs just couldn't keep up.
But, I wasn't in the back of the pack and he was the only thing ahead of me.
And so I gave it a last little push until I caught up with him.

"Do you know how much you say 'I can't'?" he asked.
"Really? Me?"
"Yes. A lot."
"You know, sometimes I'm just being dramatic. It's just something to say to be whiny when I don't want to do the next big thing on the hike."
"I know...but you still hear the words and I promise it's reinforcing the belief that you actually can't.

It was Friday.
The day AFTER the treading experience when I had said "I can't" over and over and over again.
I had simply never been in a situation where I even had a reason to say it as much as I did there. So I never realized how much I said it...or rather, how much I thought it.

And I knew it was a word I had become much too comfortable with. So I made a promise to Kendall right then and there that I wouldn't say it anymore.

A couple of weeks before leaving for Fitness Ridge someone asked me what I most hoped to have happen from the experience.
"I want to know I can do hard things."

It really was that simple.
There are many things in my life that have seemed hard or "out of reach" and inside I think I was often saying "I Can't".
But, really, saying "I Can't" is not much different than saying "God can't" and of course God CAN...which means only one thing.

And that is why "can't" is not a word you can hear me saying.
Kendall was right. My spirit was hearing me say it everytime.
But, not anymore.
I simply can't can't.

Instead I know I CAN...
Every Wednesday night when I can be found at 24 Hour Fitness with my friend Erin pushing each other in our own little treading class.
Every Monday morning when my alarm goes off at 5:15 am and there is no one there to know I'm getting up.
Every time I walk away from the ice cream freezer at the grocery store (I wish that wasn't still such a temptation but I am an ice cream girl. I am.)

One of the trainers at Fitness Ridge was famous for asking "Why?" after telling us to do something. We had learned there was only one appropriate answer to her question:

"BECAUSE I CAN"

And that's why I'm doing what I'm doing now.
Because I can.

And I can because He can.
And knowing that changes everything.

"For with God nothing shall be impossible." (Luke 1:37)


(image from art.com)